The Most Natural Thing in the World
Lenora Mesibov
Tappan NY USA
From: NEW BEGINNINGS, Vol. 20 No. 1, January-February 2003, p. 29
After four weeks of bed
rest and 24 hours of labor, my daughter, Rachel, was born. My husband
and I were excited and scared. She was five weeks early and she seemed
so tiny at five pounds, 11 ounces. The babies in both our families had
always been larger than eight pounds.
Because Rachel was early, she had a very hard time latching on. We went
home from the birthing center, but she was not nursing well. She lost
12 percent of her birth weight by her first pediatrician's appointment
when she was two days old. The doctor was firm that we must give her
a bottle after every other feeding. I could pump and use human milk.
We had to make sure she was getting fed, but worried that using a bottle
to feed her would interfere with her learning to breastfeed.
By Rachel's third day home,
I was engorged and crying. It was 4 am and I begged my husband to go
to the store and get formula. "I can't do this," I told him,
"It's never going to work." My husband sat up, put his arms
around me, and refused to leave my side. He said, "This is the
most natural thing in the world. We had a good pregnancy, natural labor,
and a healthy baby. Let's keep up the good work. Try again."
While we worked on breastfeeding,
I still pumped and my husband fed her my milk. He tenderly cradled our
daughter and sang to her while feeding her. But I was getting very frustrated
with the situation. My breasts hurt from engorgement. My husband handed
me the phone and said, "Call Dyana, she knows how to get in touch
with those La Leche people." I waited to call until 8 pm. I was
afraid because it felt as though I was admitting to failure.
When I finally reached Maddy
from La Leche League of Clarkstown, I was hysterical and exhausted.
She gently talked me through latch on, told me how to relieve the engorgement,
and she said, "For tonight, it is okay to give the baby the bottle
because feeding her is the most important thing. Tomorrow we will work
on correcting the problem. Get some rest." Her loving words gave
me comfort and encouragement.
The next morning I called
a lactation consultant, who came and worked with us for the next three
days to help us learn to breastfeed Rachel properly. She showed us all
the latest tricks and taught my husband how to finger-feed Rachel my
pumped milk.
Paul spent many hours in
the rocking chair finger-feeding our daughter. He sat beside me while
I pumped. He played guitar to us while we tried to nurse or sleep and
got up to get Rachel in the middle of the night. He warmed my milk so
we could finger-feed when necessary. He made me tea, fixed my meals,
and encouraged me to shower and rest.
When Rachel was two weeks
old, Paul drove us to our first La Leche League meeting. Maddy was there,
and she watched Rachel breastfeed and offered more help and encouragement
to me and to two other women sitting on the couch with me. Paul waited
patiently in the car.
It took six weeks before Rachel was breastfeeding well. Paul came in
one morning while I was nursing on one side and pumping on the other
and said, "It is time to return the pump-you made it!" I said,
"No, baby, we made it. Thank you." I danced around the house
the day I sent the rental pump back.
When our second child, Nicholas,
was born, I was exhausted after a tough labor but determined to nurse
right away. I was still in the hot tub that I had rented to give birth
in. I had both my hands on the baby so that he wouldn't slip into the
water, so it was difficult to support my breast to nurse. Paul knelt
down beside me and gently lifted my breast and positioned the nipple
so Nicholas could latch on. Paul had learned as much as I had about
proper latch-on and positioning!
We became a nursing family.
Without Paul's help, love, tenderness and support, I would have never
breastfed my two children so successfully. And now I do volunteer work
for La Leche League, leading meetings and organizing our Area Conference.
Paul even leads Conferences sessions and proofreads the registration
brochure and other Conference documents.
I watch him with our children
and his tenderness continues to amaze me. "I married the perfect
daddy," I tell myself.
Last updated Wednesday, October 25, 2006 by njb.
Page last edited Sun Oct 14 09:30:12 UTC 2007.
