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Comparing Series Meeting
Formats
from LEAVEN, May-June 1990
by Sharon Barsotti
Illinois, USA
*If you can provide page
numbers for this article, please send them to Publications.
During most of the seven
years I have been a La Leche League Leader, I've led my Group's Series
Meetings as I was taught by my co-Leader without giving much thought
to how other Leaders led their meetings. However, while helping Leader
Applicants in my Group prepare for leadership, I began to compare the
dynamics of different discussion formats. During the course of their
Leader preparation, we talked about planning and leading meetings, and
we visited other nearby Groups, discussing the differences between their
meetings and ours. As we talked, we noticed that meeting formats fell
into certain categories. Many Groups routinely led their meetings using
a round robin, that is, asking the mothers to speak in turn around the
circle. The Leader sometimes began the discussion by delivering a question
that the mothers answered in turn. Or the Leader gave the mothers cards
or slips of paper that they were asked to read in turn. Other Groups
we visited relied regularly on visual or discussion aids, sometimes
in combination with a round robin. (When I refer to a visual aid, I
do not mean holding up a book or writing main points on a board, as
Michael Brandwein suggests in his International Conference sessions.
I mean a visual focus around which the discussion is centered.) For
example, at one meeting we visited, an LLL poster was cut into puzzle
pieces with a question written on the back of each one. These puzzle
pieces were distributed to the mothers in the Group. The mothers then
read the questions aloud in order around the circle and they were discussed
by the entire Group. At the end of the meeting, the puzzle was assembled.
Another Group used the letters in the word BREASTFEEDING as a discussion
aid, with the Leader asking each mother in turn around the circle to
give an advantage of breastfeeding that began with one of the letters.
We noticed that our meetings didn't fit into any of these categories.
We didn't use a round robin except when the mothers introduced themselves.
We almost never used visual or discussion aids. Although we always opened
the discussion with an opening statement to set the tone and to get
the mothers thinking in the desired direction, we didn't lecture. The
mothers did most of the talking. Our meetings seemed to follow a "conversation-style"
format. Although we planned our meetings with great care, our discussions
were natural and free-flowing, like an impromptu conversation between
the Leader and the mothers.
Mothers' Feelings about
Different Formats
I began by thinking that
the differences among meeting formats were insignificant, but after
talking to mothers who had attended more than one type of meeting, I
realized that the format can affect a mother's feelings about the meeting.
Recently, at one of our Evaluation Meetings, our new Greeter described
an experience she'd had at another Group's Series Meeting.
It was my first meeting.
The Leader had made a cardboard mailbox, and each of us was given a
postcard from the mailbox. The Leader went around the circle and asked
each of us to read the question written on our postcard and either answer
it or ask someone else in the Group to answer it.
I had just had my first baby
and didn't know very much about breastfeeding. On my card was a question
on nipple confusion - about which I knew nothing, so I asked someone
else to respond. Another mother explained in great detail about nipple
confusion and why not to give babies artificial nipples in the early
weeks. I felt so ignorant. Some of the other mothers talked a lot about
what was on their card and I felt as though I came across as really
stupid.
I was surprised at her strong
reaction. I knew from THE NEW LEADER'S HANDBOOK the drawbacks of using
"test questions" to stimulate discussion (see pages 44-45), but I had
assumed that as long as the Leader made it clear to the mothers that
they did not have to answer the questions themselves, they would not
feel pressured. Our Greeter's account of her feelings convinced me otherwise.
This pressure might be less if the mother was asked to share an experience
rather than answer a "test question" asking for information. (Think
of how much easier it is to answer the question "What advantage of breastfeeding
is particularly important to you?" as opposed to "What is an advantage
of breastfeeding that starts with the letter 'F'?") But if the mother
who reads the question does not have an experience relating to what's
written on her card, she might feel as our Greeter did - or even worse
if she does have an experience but does not want to share it with the
Group. Our Greeter finished her story by saying,
"I like conversation-style
discussions much better, because I never feel put on the spot. I can
talk if I have something to say or just listen if I feel like it." On
round robins, a Leader Applicant from our Group said:
"Even though I'd been coming
to LLL meetings for years, I was surprised at how nervous I felt when
I visited a Group where a round robin was used during the discussion.
I found it difficult to listen to the other mothers because I was thinking
about what I was going to say when it was my turn. And because I had
so much time to think it over, it was less spontaneous."
Even an experienced Leader
may find herself worrying about what she's going to say if she finds
herself near the end of the circle. My own experience with round robins
(Murphy's Law being what it is) is that the person whose turn comes
before mine more often than not says what I planned to say. One mother,
who had attended two other US Groups before she moved to our area, said:
"The Leaders in New Hampshire
and Virginia relied mostly on visual or discussion aids and round robins.
Although I enjoyed these meetings and gained a great deal from them,
in comparison they seem artificial, like party games. I much prefer
conversation-style discussions. They seem more natural, like heart-to-heart
talks."
How to Lead Conversation-style
Discussions
If you have never seen or
led a conversation-style discussion, you might like to give it a try.
Conversation-style discussions are not difficult to lead, but there
are different dynamics involved. A meeting that is led conversation-style
begins with careful planning. Since there are no gimmicks to keep the
momentum of the discussion going, it is important, first and foremost,
to choose a focus for the meeting that the mothers will want to discuss.
Before each meeting, my co-Leaders and I think carefully about who will
be attending. We get out our attendance sheet from the last meeting
and talk about who has called us during the last month and who we think
will be at the meeting. Then we plan the focus based on these mothers'
situations and concerns. The only exception to this is our "newcomer
rule." The newcomers' needs receive first priority. Even if all of our
regulars are in one situation and the newcomer in another, the newcomer
gets priority and the meeting focus is chosen for her. Our definition
of a newcomer is any woman who is attending this meeting in our series
for the first time. What makes a conversation-style discussion different
from a round robin or a meeting that is centered around visual or discussion
aids is that the discussion flows naturally. Once the Leader delivers
the question to open the discussion (THE NEW LEADER'S HANDBOOK lists
many opening questions from which to choose), the mothers respond as
they wish. The discussion is like a free-flowing conversation between
the Leader and the mothers. The mothers have the freedom to respond
whenever they have something to say. No one is ever pressured to speak
or has to wait her turn. As with any meeting format, the Leader is "the
voice of La Leche League," so the newcomers get a sense of where LLL
stands in the midst of a variety of personal experiences. However, in
the conversation style discussion it is especially important for the
Leader to respond to each mother in order to keep up the momentum of
the discussion. When responding, the Leader may only need to nod or
give a brief affirmation. Or, if she feels the newcomers need more information,
she may ask the mother to expand on her comments or expand on them herself.
The Leader's consistent response to each mother who speaks gives the
discussion its conversational quality. The Leader's job is also to guide
the discussion so that the intended points are covered. If the mothers
are enthusiastic and talkative, one well-phrased question at the beginning
of the discussion may stimulate enough conversation to cover the topic
well (especially if the meeting focus is well chosen). The biggest fear
Leaders seem to have about this format is that the mothers won't talk
and they will face a silent audience not knowing what to do next. But
if the discussion stalls, there are several ways the Leader can keep
the discussion going. Let's say, for example, that the topic is "Nutrition
and Weaning" and because the mothers attending (including newcomers)
have mostly older babies, the focus is weaning and the points are the
reasons an older baby might benefit from continuing to breastfeed. The
opening question is: "Once your baby is eating solids regularly, why
would you want to continue to nurse?" If the discussion stalls the Leader
can:
Prepare in advance several
more specific questions to bring out the desired points, for example,
"Many of you have shared the emotional benefits of nursing your older
babies. What are some of the practical benefits?' Or, "How about sleep?
Have some of you found that nursing makes nap times and bedtimes easier?
Prepare several general questions
relating to the meeting focus in case the points have been covered and
there is more time left for discussion. For example, "Have your feelings
changed since your baby was born about how long you would breastfeed?
If so, how?" Call on specific mothers to share their experiences. The
Leader will know the experiences of regularly attending mothers, but
it may help to jot down the mothers, names and their experiences as
a reminder in case there is a lull in the discussion For example, "Mary,
you told me not long ago some of the reasons you enjoy nursing Sarah
at this age. Would you like to share them with us?" If the Leader is
not sure the mother would be comfortable being called on, she should
ask her permission before the meeting. If you still find it difficult
to visualize the dynamics of a conversation-style discussion and would
like to see a demonstration, join me and my co-Leader, Julie Stock,
a year from July at the next International Conference in Miami Beach,
where we'll be leading the session, "Leading a Conversation style Discussion."
As part of our session we plan to demonstrate a conversation-style discussion.
Be Flexible
It may seem risky to try
a new meeting format, especially if meetings are going well. There's
no denying that round robins and visual and discussion aids offer definite
advantages to the Leader. For one, momentum is automatically provided.
If a mother finishes talking, you don't have to worry about what to
say next, just go on to the next mother. Also, a round robin or a discussion
aid may require less preparation time. (A visual aid, on the other hand,
may require more.) And Leaders sometimes become bored using one approach
all the time and enjoy varying meeting formats for a change of pace.
The type of mothers attending meetings can also influence a Leader's
choice of meeting format. For example, a Leader may find that a format
that works well when talkative mothers attend meetings needs adjustment
when the mothers do not participate as freely. Also, Leaders are unique
individuals, with different personalities and different leading styles.
Some Leaders find the conversation style discussion more naturally suited
to their personalities. Other Leaders prefer to vary their formats,
using round robins and visual or discussion aids to add variety. Whatever
the Leader's inclination, mastering the conversation-style discussion
will increase her versatility, giving her another tool with which to
meet the needs of the mothers in her Group.
Consider the Newcomer
When considering a meeting
format, think of it first from the perspective of the newcomer. At Series
Meetings the needs and feelings of the newcomer should always be the
primary consideration. (On the other hand, Evaluation, Toddler, and
Couples' Meetings are places where the needs of the regularly attending
mothers can be the primary focus.) Ask yourself:
Will the newcomers be able
to choose whether or not they participate in the discussion? Many newcomers
come to meetings to learn but may not want to join the discussion. Most
would prefer to be given the choice. Make sure a newcomer will not be
expected to respond to a question to which she may not know the answer.
Does my meeting format enhance
communication between the Leader and the mothers, or does it sometimes
get in the way, making exchanges stilted or artificial? Genuine communication
can sometimes be inhibited by visual and discussion aids, especially
when there are many parts to keep track of or instructions to remember.
Also, if a meeting format involves lots of reading aloud, be wary. This
leaves less time for sharing experiences.
Is my meeting format flexible
enough so that individual concerns can be discussed? Some Leaders feel
more at ease with a highly structured meeting plan. They may be tempted
to maintain tight control over the discussion to avoid the unexpected.
But a meeting where every second is planned may not allow newcomers
to raise their concerns. Be sure to allow some open time for questions
at every meeting. Make an Informed Choice You can make an informed choice
about meeting formats by learning, observing, and experimenting. Read
the section in Chapter 3 of THE NEW LEADER'S HANDBOOK on "Choosing a
Format" (pp. 3740). Visit other Groups and observe how they lead their
discussions. It is easier to focus on the dynamics of a meeting when
your own plan is not at stake and you are not personally involved with
the mothers. Be open to trying new ways if the newcomer will benefit.
Rather than trying a new format just for the sake of variety, first
imagine it from the newcomer's point of view. If you think she will
find it interesting and it will allow her to ask her questions and participate
as much or as little as she wants, take a chance and give it a try.
My Best Meeting Ever
Leading Series Meetings has
always been my least favorite part of being a Leader. During my eleven
years of leading meetings, I have routinely used the round robin format.
I have tried various ways to make this approach interesting and helpful,
but I was never really comfortable with it. At a recent Chapter Meeting,
I learned about leading a conversation-style discussion. It sounded
so interesting that I decided to try it at my next Series Meeting. As
my meeting date approached, though, I began to doubt if I could do it.
I had almost made up my mind not to try, but I kept thinking of my own
experience as a new mother and how uncomfortable I felt about being
put on the spot during the round robin discussions. This motivated me
to take courage and try this new approach. Each month I always set aside
a block of time to prepare for my meeting, but on this particular day,
I was interrupted so many times I didn't have a chance to prepare as
I normally do. However, this turned out not to be a problem, because
I found the conversation-style discussion easy to prepare for. THE NEW
LEADER'S HANDBOOK gave me the tools I needed to lead a meeting this
way. I re-read the section pertaining to the meeting topic, then jotted
down several discussion questions that seemed to address the concerns
of the mothers attending. I opened the meeting as usual by introducing
myself and my co-Leader. After the announcements, I asked everyone to
introduce themselves. Then I gave an introduction to the meeting and
threw it open to discussion, using one of the discussion questions I
had prepared. I kept the conversation flowing by affirming the mothers'
responses and occasionally directing the discussion. This turned out
to be the best meeting I have ever led. I was surprised at how easily
all the necessary points were covered. The mothers didn't hesitate to
ask questions or add to the discussion, and no one felt put on the spot.
I not only felt relaxed during the meeting, for the first time I even
had a good time leading.
Note: contact information updated 11/17/06
Page last edited Sun Oct 14 09:31:04 UTC 2007.
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