Employed Mothers: Supporting Breastfeeding and Mother-Baby Attachment
Kathleen King
Ayden NC USA
From: LEAVEN, Vol. 37 No. 5, October-November 2001, p. 101.
"Every mother is a working
mother" is much more than a t-shirt slogan. It is a statement that shows
how much all mothers have in common, no matter what their lives are
like. Every mother is intruded upon by the demands of the world outside
herself and her baby. In fact, since the beginning of time, mothers
have worked and tended to their babies. In recent times these mothers
are often called "working mothers" but they may be volunteers, students,
employers, or tennis players. Gale Pryor's session had many ideas that
Leaders can share with mothers who are juggling the world's demands
and the baby's needs. (For lack of a better term, Pryor used the phrase,
"working mother" to describe these mothers.)
Breastfeeding helps mothers
remain attached to their babies while adjusting to the interruptions
of working outside the home. A major technique is "reverse cycle feeding."
Pryor said that many babies will reverse their sleeping and feeding
schedule to accommodate the fact that mother is gone. They do most of
their nursing between 5:30 PM and 7:00 AM. Rather than considering that
the baby is in an emotional shutdown when mother is not there, Pryor
suggests that reverse feeding indicates the baby is attached to mother
and waiting for her. Leaders can encourage working mothers to record
their baby's schedule before their return to work. In this way mothers
will be able to see how their baby adjusts while still getting as many
times at the breast, just at different times than before.
Sharing sleep with the baby
is a vital technique for the working mother. Especially if the baby
is reverse cycle feeding, the mother may be very concerned about getting
enough rest so she can perform well at work the next day. For many cultures,
sharing sleep is not acceptable. However, for breastfeeding families
it is often lifesaving. Mothers will be interested in research that
shows that sleeping with baby enhances the breastfeeding relationship
and the mother's and baby's health. Once the working mother realizes
that she and the baby will return to sleep more quickly when they are
sharing sleep, she may feel more comfortable. Of course, to make this
technique most effective, the mother needs to be able to breastfeed
lying down. Leaders can demonstrate this at meetings and discuss it
during phone calls. Lying down and sleeping with the baby are important
ways for the working mother to rest.
Many working mothers find
that a supportive care provider is essential to continuing breastfeeding
and the mother-baby bond. Once mothers realize that babies can make
multiple attachments, they will feel more comfortable with encouraging
a close relationship between the baby and the caregiver. One way to
do this is to ask the caregiver to use a sling, if the mother uses one.
If the caregiver is unfamiliar with slings, the mother may need to share
the benefits of "wearing" the baby. One technique is for the mother
to visit the caregiver while wearing her baby in the sling. The two
of them could then participate in the caregiver's chores, which would
demonstrate the convenience of the sling. Giving the caregiver a sling
would also encourage its use. One working mother told her caregiver
that her baby had been prescribed three hours of sling time a day and
asked the caregiver to help fulfill the allotted time.
Slings are also a useful
tool for introducing the baby to the workplace. Some working mothers
have been able to gradually return to the workplace by first offering
to do some work at home with the baby. Then, they may offer to come
to work for an important meeting. With baby in a sling, his needs are
easily met. Coworkers realize that it is possible to combine working
and parenting. Acting with confidence makes a big difference in what
is accepted and what is not.
Pryor and session participants
gave further encouragement for making the workplace child-friendly.
Talking about children at work helps the parents to feel more attached
to their baby while enhancing adult personal growth. Ask fellow workers
about their children. Wear children's homemade gifts to work. Give them
a chance to show off pictures. At one company, children are encouraged
to visit their parents for lunch and to visit after school. Suggestions
such as these can add a more personal feel in a busy office.
Mothers can be and are very
creative in finding solutions for meeting both the child's needs and
their own needs. Solutions can come from the most unexpected places.
An attendee shared that she attended an LLL meeting desperate for ideas
to get more sleep. Her husband was opposed to having their baby in bed
with them. Her stepdaughter attended with her. At the meeting, many
solutions were mentioned including using the crib as a sidecar. The
mother was too exhausted to even discuss this idea with her husband.
Much to her surprise, when she finally stumbled into the bedroom, there
was the crib, attached to the bed. A sidecar! It seems her stepdaughter
had been listening and told her father that this was what was needed.
Leaders can help a mother find creative solutions to even the thorniest
of problems by brainstorming with her. There is a solution to every
problem!
Kathleen King of Ayden,
North Carolina, USA has been a Leader for 15 years and is presently
LLLOnline FAQ/Help Form FAQ Administrator. She has three children: Joseph,
18; Leslie, 15; and Michael, 12. She is married to George and helps
him with their family business.
Last updated Monday, September 11, 2006 by njb.
Page last edited Sun Oct 14 09:32:13 UTC 2007.
